July 27, 2009
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Demolished Minds Incorporated
I hate that I have so many artistic ideas, and not enough time or resources in which to accomplish them.
I hate that my video camera won't tell me what it wants, what it needs to produce cinematic magic.
I hate that my lack of internet has caused me to abandon blogging.
I hate that I smell phantom tacos on an empty stomach.
I hate that being quiet is considered being boring instead of mysterious.
I hate that I have the feeling again of being awkward.
I hate that people continuously question what I do.
I hate that my mom blew up at my dad during his birthday lunch.
I hate that my boyfriend is figuring out just how fickle his friendships are because he's in a good place in his life, his heart is healing, his body and soul are clean, and he has love. What I hate more is the fact that to make his friendships less fickle, he would have to live life in a haze of maryjane, numb himself, lose IQ points, and become a drone, if that even makes sense. I hate that if it came to that, I would probably leave him and sever my soul.
I hate that I can't find good spooky mystical pictures on googleimages.
I hate that I'm jealous of those two-dimensional and/or scandalous. I hate that I'm jealous of a dark dye job and eyeliner, of revealing clothing and converse shoes, and that I feel like I'm alone in my persona.
I hate that I have self-imposed responsibilities right now, and that I can't just rush out into a grassy field, throw off my shoes, and roll around until my entire being is covered in green. But maybe in a couple of hours...
Comments (2)
Rae-Rae. Methinks you've gone emo since I left you. I somehow feel this is my fault and that I owe you a good time--perhaps a hug. Since I won't be near you for a couple of weeks, maybe I should do these things by proxy. Would a slightly overweight Mexican do?
On a related subject, I don't actually see Paul as overweight. He does, though, and I felt the arrangement of the words at the time.
@skiingwithpeguins -
I haven't really become emo, Kimmu my love. It was just a rant. I have those from time to time. When I have a bad day, I write crazy things and then let the feelings go. I heart your face, though, for suggesting hugs.
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